I came across this article in msnbc.msn.com written by John Frenaye which according to him are the five steps needed to cure homesickness.
In a nutshell, these are the things he recommend for tackling effectively the issue of homesickness when away from home.
- Bring a piece of home with you. Nothing eases homesickness than a few mementos of your home and loved ones. Bring small photographs in a folding frame for your nightstand— your kids, wife, girlfriend, or loyal pooch. Do you have any young kids? Bring a recent piece of “art.” Does your wife or girlfriend wear a perfume that you love — bring along a sachet that will remind you of her.
- Stay in touch. Keeping in touch keeps home close to you and you close to home. There are ways to work around a time difference, but it is important to be sure to keep in touch with your home base — not your office, your home base. Be sure you know that Jimmy won his soccer game, and that your wife had the day from hell, and that Susie has the sniffles. If you are in Europe, call late at night just before you go to bed, and if you find yourself in Asia, set your alarm for a 15 minute conversation in the middle of the night. Call on their time, not yours.
- Use technology. If you have a laptop, keep in touch with “just thinking about you” e-mails, consider an instant messaging program, or even a webcam for the face-to-face conversation. I know that my evening out with some clients will go a lot better when my Elizabeth (my daughter) pops onto my instant messaging to tell me about the “way cool lacrosse game” she just finished. While I do not have a webcam, many of our clients do use them to keep in touch — it is a living photograph and closes the distance gap just a little more.
- Blog it. Blogging is all the rage. It’s is a personal piece of cyberspace to voice your opinions, keep your thoughts, photos, and memories. Google has a partnership with Blogger, which allows you to blog for free. Just give your personal address to your friends and family and you all can share and post to keep one another up to date. If you are not as tech-savvy as you would like, a travel journal is a great alternative. Don’t bore the neighbors, but a journal and some photos to really see what mommy or daddy does when they go away is a fantastic way to keep in touch.
- Pick the right place to stay. While bringing a piece of home with you and keeping in touch will go a long way to ease the pain of a road trip, the fact remains that a hotel is still a hotel. Or is it? If you find yourself away from home for an extended period of time — say, 10 days or more, you ought to look into long-term corporate housing. I am not talking about those extended stay places that add a refrigerator, microwave, and coffee pot to the standard fare hotel room. I’m talking about a full-blown home away from home.
Comments
Hi Ravi, these are nice articles. But I think you should mention where you are taking this article first. posting courtesy at the end of it (which most of them don't read) will make believe that you are the author.
anyway - these are my thoughts you are free to do what you want. But the usual way its done in blogsphere is to quote the person rather than copy the entire article and then say courtesy
okay...to be fair,it's more of a short-term remedy. Not meant for people far away for long, long, loong periods of time. Nothing can cure that.
-just popping in
Ive really tried to fit in, tried to find good points and tried to 'move on' - but 9 months down the line its getting really hard:
Im out of work (unemployment is bad up here and my style "too conscientious" of work doesnt suit them up here. My personality "southern do-gooder/prim and proper/too nice" isnt really welcome either.
Ive moved a lot in my life and eventually chose Cambridge UK 21 years ago. I had a good job at the University and I loved the big skies, open minds, diversity of people and vast opportunities for learning - now i have no job, no friends, no future.
I just ache in my heart over what I have given up to join my partner. He loves it here, has been promoted too.
Me - Im all washed up and contemplating various ways out.
could do with a friend. anyone out there?
Vicki :(
I'm asking for help, please reply.
I'm concerned about homesickness because I'm going to be applying for colleges, and at first I'll be excited, but as soon as we are done unpacking and my mom leaves, all the positive things will be gone and I'll get unbelievably homesick. And I really don't want to be in a new place were my first impression on people is the cry baby or something... haha
Please help
1. Write down what you'd like your life to be like in 3, 6 and 12 months. These goals will focus you. Consider each area of your life; friends, work, hobbies, etc. Know where you are going and want to go there.
2. Take baby steps and recognise your progress. You are not going to walk out the door and meet your new best friend today. But if you make 20 acqaintances this month, in 3 months time a couple of them might be becoming good mates. Acqaintenances are easy - chat to shop assistants, neighbours, the postman...
3. Ask yourself what it is about creating this new life that seems the greatest hurdle? Ask yourself what you need to do to overcome this. Now decide what the first step is. And do it. Recognise your achievement and repeat the process daily until jumping hurdles becomes your natural response to stress.
4. Use your homesickness to help you! If you feel a bout of homesickness overwhelming you ask yourself, what is the stress you are facing that is making you want to bolt for safety? Deal with it as per number 3!
This is a creative phase of our lives and we need to make it work for us - what an achievement that will feel like! Good luck.
You have given me a glimmer of hope. It is all about being brave when you want to curl up and run home. I think that the only thing that I can add is to keep a bit of your routine from home. I have two dogs and I have kept them on the same walking/feeding schedule as back home. That has help me and the dogs stay a bit sane.
hanging on till then
-C
I do remember the nausea and lack of appetite myself. You feel this emotion really physically, don't you? Is there anyone you can confide in? Be brave and ask for help to get through this. Friend? Counsellor? The more help you get, the faster you wil get beyond these overwhelming feelings.
I hope that you find someone to sit and talk to honestly about your feelings. I know it will help more than you can imagine right now. Things will be ok. Take it slowly, xxxx
My heart is sick, I cannot eat, I cannot think straight, I cry every day - it is a physical pain that is sometimes unbearable. I have even threatened to divorce my husband and move with the kids if he doesn't quit his job and move us back at the end of the term of the lease on our house.
I have met some wonderful people and am involved in some good things here, but it's not home and never will be. It's not family and it never will be. I feel so hopeless and so helpless...
I have suffered with homesickness my whole life. At 11 years old, I was ripped away from my home and mother in Australia and taken to the US by an abusive father. We were brought home for visits twice a year that reopened the wounds and made the homesickness for Australia unbearable because we were never able to move on. After 20 years in the US I have moved on and never been more confused in my whole life. I have my family back, but it's like being directly inserted back into your childhood. My family can be very mean sometimes and difficult to handle but I know they love me so that helps. But moving all the way back here to be closer to them has made me realise that I'm homesick for the place I lived for 20 years! The thing is, I never really liked it there. How confusing is that!
What complicates matters is that my husband is from the US and he moved out here to be with me. He's handling things really well but of course he's homesick too. He likes it better here but he of course misses his old life, his family, and his freedom. He doesn't know anyone but me and he won't leave the house without me, and even then I have to force him. He's retreating into an online world, as am I. Right now we're stuck inside because of a flood and I just don't know what to do! Should I go back to the US? Every time I do it feels like I'm being ripped away from Australia against my will, even though it is my choice. It hurts so much. And then when I get back to the US, I'm homesick for Australia. But I was in the US for 20 years! Which place is home? We've been here for a few months now and things have been getting harder,not easier. My husband has to wait six to nine months for his visa (minimum) and during that time my US green card may get revoked. We picked up our whole lives to live a dream that feels broken. I'm scared to stay, but equally scared to give up and go back to a life that was unsatisfying enough to make us leave to begin with! My poor husband has been watching me go through awful pain and he's tired of me dragging him into it. After all, he did this for me and I'm still not happy. I don't want to make his life unhappy. He says he will live wherever I want, I just have to pick a place. Part of the problem is the town we're in in Australia. It's very small. I picked it because it's kind of close to my sister (45 mins) but other than that my Mum and Stepdad are in a town I don't want to live in. We don't know anyone else. I have always had this yearning to return to the place where I was yanked out of, to try and remedy my childhood, but it doesn't work that way. You can't just pick up where you left off if there's a gap of 20 years! The thought of moving is just awful but so is the thought of staying. I need some help. I don't know who to turn to. My sister is new in her new town and she's leaving soon for 3 months so we'll be totally alone. I had so many hopes that just feel dashed now. Where is home? Where do I belong? What do I do? I am fully aware that there is not a simple solution to my situation. Any ideas would be appreciated. Thanks for listening - I need to feel as though there's hope!